Celebrate Sobriety!!!!

My husband and I have a difference in opinion about whether or not sobriety is something to be celebrated. He doesn’t think so, as he thinks it is simply what responsible people do when they have a drinking problem. My husband quit drinking when I did, mainly to support me, so we both passed our one-year sobriety date this last weekend.

He has the right to his opinion. He doesn’t identify with being an alcoholic and may indeed resume drinking moderately at some point. I am okay with that for the most part. I wasn’t okay with him drinking at first because I knew I couldn’t do it without him, as he was my party buddy, but now I feel strong enough to handle being sober alone. I enjoy being sober and wouldn’t want to go back to my old way of life.

I worry about it because I worry about everything. I am working on that.

This isn’t a post to bash my husband’s opinions, but rather an opportunity to state my opinion on the subject of celebrating sobriety.

My view? It absolutely, 100%, most definitely should be celebrated. In many cases getting sober saves people’s lives. I believe it saved my life. Getting sober is hard! It takes some serious guts and determination to learn how to live life without drugs or alcohol. Plus, in recovery you learn all sorts of neat stuff about who you are and what you want. You learn how to live life without an escape hatch or a way to numb your emotions. You learn how to live life on life’s terms, which is a lesson that everyone should learn, addict or not.

If you are sober, no matter for how long, take some time to celebrate that fact. Don’t be ashamed that you have gone down this path in life. Many awesome people have gone before you. Sobriety rules!

 

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36 thoughts on “Celebrate Sobriety!!!!

  1. It says a lot your husband was willing to stop drinking out of support for you, though I could see how this comment might have hurt your feelings. People make a lot of noise when something is disruptive but take things like stability and peace for granted. I am glad you are making a point to celebrate, because like you said, it takes serious guts to strip away our safety blankets and simply learn to cope with life. Serious congratulations on your one year anniversary!

      • I could so relate to this post. I had my 6 months on Tuesday September 30. It’s been a rough road for me because my husband doesn’t get why I did it. Oh sure he thought I drank too much and if I coukd just moderate things would be fine. He doesn’t believe in AA and I struggle to find a good time to go to meetings. But I celebrate my sobriety because it is great. I have found out more about me without a heavy blanket of booze and I like ME!

  2. Yes! Sobriety rocks. Without that one word I would be on my way to another wasted day, and another hungover tomorrow. Parades every day! Even if they are mini ones with only a little cheering. I know I catch my eye once a day and give myself a sober high five smile. πŸ™‚

  3. I’m with you on this for sure. Yes, your husband is marvellous for quitting to support you. But I think it’s only when you’ve felt the horror of alcohol holding you down for so long, the way it has for those of us who have problems with alcohol, that you feel the freedom in getting out from under it. So yes, I’m all about the celebration! Sober is great!!! (And you’re pretty great, too!) xo

    • Aw, thanks TS! You are so right about the feelings of freedom and horror surrounding the whole thing…it’s really hard to explain to someone who hasn’t experienced it in the same way. Nice to know I am not alone even if everyone in my life doesn’t quite get it. xo

    • Yeah it has been a huge gesture of support, as it would have been much harder for me to get out of my situation alone. Not impossible, but harder. I agree that a little celebration is in order everyday!

  4. I too celebrate my recovery every day. I can also appreciate why your husband takes the position he does. It’s like someone without an eating disorder not seeing what the big deal is about a bulemic who stops purging, or an anorexic who starts eating a healthy diet. After 30 years of sobriety, my mother still does not get why I can’t just have a beer every now and then!

    Congratulations on your recovery.

    • Thank you Robert! I can understand my husband’s perspective, too. It made me further realize that he isn’t an alcoholic! He is supportive and it means a lot. We can celebrate sobriety regardless of what others think! πŸ™‚

  5. I think it’s something to be celebrated. I understand where your husband is coming from, but with all due respect, he doesn’t understand the underlying causes and conditions that beg us to drink. I know folks who toe that line, but in the end, it is our journey. I am not saying we pat ourselves on the back every moment, but to see how far we come along the line is certainly something to be happy and proud about. I could stop eating brussel sprouts for a year and not celebrate it, but for someone who has a serious problem with them and can face and overcome what compells them to eat brussel sprouts, then hell ya…celebrate!

    • Thanks Paul! I agree completely. There are benefits that people gain from quitting drinking even if they aren’t quite alcoholics, but it is not the same thing. I feel like quitting saved my life, which is definitely something to celebrate and acknowledge. A new beginning and all that. πŸ™‚

  6. I agree with everyone above… celebrate, celebrate, celebrate! Your husband is not an alcoholic, so he will never understand. I used to wake up every morning and feel celebratory! And on big milestones, like a yearly… I mean, presents wouldn’t be out of the question (alright, I never actually got presents, but I certainly wouldn’t turn one down).

    So, be grateful that your husband is supporting you, then come celebrate with us πŸ™‚ And big congrats on one year… that is HUGE!!!

  7. As a bloke I can identify with your husband’s point of view. I would hate to say it’s a man thing, because I am sure there are plenty of men who will celebrate their sobriety, but what the heck I am going to say it anyway.

    “It’s a man thing.”

    I think it has something to do with ego, although your husband will never admit it.

    “What’s the big deal.”

    I think this approach also allows a way back in should the person wish to resume drinking. It creates the illusion that you can easily quit again. If you are celebrating ‘sobriety’ then you are making something big out of it. Then how can you start drinking again?

    This is purely my opinion based on my male experience.

    When I quit I quietly celebrated everyday, but I never openly celebrated my sobriety. It says something that I can’t even tell you when I quit. I don’t know the month, certainly don’t know the day and have to read old blogs to remember the year.

    That being said, I encourage my clients to celebrate their sobriety, because it’s important. It strengthens the beliefs that alcohol is a nasty bastard. A tough son of a bitch that you defeated. To think otherwise is dangerous.

    I also think over time sobriety just becomes a way of life and there is no need to celebrate it any longer (in the traditional sense).

    I continue to celebrate sobriety every morning when I get down on my knees and say my gratitudes to the universe.

    Lee

  8. Congratulations on ur #sobriety. I think that your husband sounds like an awesome guy & I’m thankful for guys like him in the world. My husband is equally supportive 4 my many #lifeimprovements.

    God bless. I’d like 2 link this post as an “in-line link”. Thanks 4 writing a great post. {#blogzine} ΒΆ

  9. Congratulations on your one year!
    My husband quit as well when I did which made for having a home that was the necessary safety zone in early recovery.

    I wanted to say though, I do have mixed feelings about celebrating my anniversary date. On one hand it’s like celebrating I have a disease (ewww) and on the other it’s a testament to all the hard work and growth that came with it. It was good to read all the positive responses to your post.

  10. I really like this blog. I have been sober since September 9th. Six days of detox (outpatient) and now, working on sobriety. I have had only a few triggers but I have tapped my forehead and told Satan to get out of my heart. Works so far. But I know the big ball hasn’t dropped yet. To be sure though, it feels good to think straight. And so far, I don’t want to go back to drinking. That sucked.
    Thanks for the Blog. I have subscribed and look forward to your future postings L)

  11. Celebrate! Acknowledgment comes from within you too. If you think you should celebrate and feel proud of your anniversary go right ahead. You totally deserve to. πŸ™‚ Hubby had different reasons for nixing the drinks so his need to celebrate, understandably, would be different.

  12. After decades of addiction, a dui forced me to use Antabuse to break the insanity even if it killed me. After all the damage I had done, I began to hate alcohol tobacco and drugs. At about the 5 year total sobriety point, special thankfulness filled my body and mind.
    At the 10 year total sobriety point, I awoke one Saturday morning with mystical feelings of peace. assurance, and sustained happiness. It was no longer an effort: the substance had died to my desire. Life has become more difficult, stressful and disappointing since sobriety from a career or vocational standpoint. But the gratitude for sobriety and the clean life is a continual natural high. Physical fitness abilities have blossomed beyond my imagination. And my body feels great. After all the fancy liquors I consumed only to get ulcers and a mangled throat, today a Vernors on the rock tastes like heavenly water. Be straight-edge regardless of who may ostrasize you. Your best life is harmony within spiritually, physically, psychologically and mentally. Make a lifelong unshakable commitment. You will never regret it. Blessing forever.

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