Today is a good day. Writing about my plans for later in the week (in my last post) helped to relieve some stress, and I have been spending time thinking about how much more positive I feel compared to when I was drinking. Plus, you guys! I got a new haircut. A totally new look, and I love it! I feel like a different person. Or… that’s not right exactly… I feel more like myself with this haircut. Yes, that’s it. It suits me quite well, I love it, and I never would have had the balls to do it in the past. And really… who cares what anybody else thinks, anyway? It’s my head! In the past I would have worried about it more, I think.
But seriously, life is good. I feel more like myself on so many levels, not just superficially because of my hair. I think quitting drinking has given me a renewed sense of self, and I am only now beginning to explore it. I know these happy feelings won’t last forever, but I sure am enjoying them while they last.
Some of these good feelings have to do with praying and meditating, I do believe. I read a quote yesterday that made a lot of sense.
“Whenever you feel inadequate, pray to be of service. When you’re in an energy of service your ego melts away.” -Gabrielle Bernstein*
I feel inadequate a lot, and praying to be of service changes my perspective. It doesn’t have to be a big service or anything, you don’t have to immediately go out and begin feeding the homeless, for example, but doing this gets me out of my own head and thinking about others in a different way. I am going to do this a few times today to stay balanced and centered before heading out to my friend’s bachelorette party this evening. Maybe I can enjoy my time at the party by listening to friends talk about themselves instead of thinking about me, me, me and drinking, drinking, drinking the whole time. We will see how it goes.
*Gabrielle Bernstein is the author of ‘Spirit Junkie’ and ‘May Cause Miracles.’ I just checked out ‘May Cause Miracles’ from the library, and am curious to see if I like it. I will write about it if it is helpful. She has been sober (mainly from a drug addiction, I believe) for 8 years.